I think this is probably one that we can all relate to, or at least one we have all seen at least once in our life. We come across a friend of ours that thinks he's better than you because of the music he listens to. I think we have all had one of those friends that brags about how much he likes My Chemical Romance since he wears black trench coats and paints skulls on his black finger nails. Or maybe the person that brags about how much they like hardcore music because they listen to Nine Inch Nails. Whatever it is, I'm sure that even though they're you're friends, you secretly loath them because of their foolish looks and taste in music, but maybe that's just me. Anyway, I have compiled a list of what I think are the top "poser" groups of people and their music, feel free to add to the list if I happened to miss one.
The Gangsta-This is the one that I think is most popular simply because rap music use to be cool, so every loser in high school decided to buy baggy t-shirts and wear large billed baseball caps and tell everyone how much they love the new Lil Wayne or Lil Jon or Lil (Insert common name) CD. But then of course we have the ones that feel they're above everyone else, because they like the "classic" rap from people like Public Enemy, or LL Cool J.
The Goth-This person typically wears all black, and talks in monotone while he brags about buying the awesome new Cradle of Filth or My Chemical Romance CD.
The Head Banger-This one only listens to one type of music, hard rock and metal. People in this group typically think they are better than everyone because they like music that is different since it has lots of screaming and growling in it, unlike regular music which just has..."singing". Popular bands in this group include, but are not limited to, All That Remains, Underoath, Haste the Day, Nine Inch Nails, etc.
The Classic Head Banger-Although close to the previous group, people in this one tend to think of themselves as being better because they only listen to the "classic" hard rock and metal music, since that was the stuff that made the genre what it is, and all the new stuff doesn't even come close to the classics. Bands here are ones like Iron Maiden, Megadeth, Metallica, Black Sabbath, etc.
The Modern Hippie-People in this group are typically the children of ex-hippies, and want to carry on the gene. They usually spend their time around a campfire with an acoustic guitar while trying to sing songs by Bob Marley, Bob Dylan, or The Doors as they experiment with various narcotics. This group usually feels they're better because they, "respect the classics man".
The Indie Blogger-This group spends most of their time in Starbucks, on their Apple computers blogging about the effects of colonization in Africa while they listen to Death Cab For Cutie, Dashboard Confessional, Modest Mouse, and Radiohead. People in this group think they're better than you and me because they support bands that aren't mainstream, which means they don't support the big, bad capitalistic record companies that force their clients to conform to popular music standards.
The Popular One-This person is the total opposite of the Indie Blogger, for they refuse to listen to anything that isn't played on Ryan Seacrest's "America's Top 40". This group has no predefined bands, since they're always changing. One day they're listening to OneRepublic, and the next day it's Beyonce.
The Classic Rocker-This one should be pretty easy to figure out, this group only listens to well, "the classics", since all modern music simply sucks. Back in their day, they listened to bands like Led Zeppelin, Aerosmith, and Queen, and they still refuse to listen to anything else. Another, even more annoying variant of this group, are the teenagers and college students that always brag about their Led Zeppelin CD collection, even though they were born twenty years after the band formed.
The Christian-A person in this group only listens to music that is sung by a "Christian band". With each band they hear on the radio, they look up them up on Jesusfreakhideout.com (Yes that is a real website...if you didn't know already), and if the band isn't in their database, then they simply refuse to listen to them ever again due to their secular messages. Bands that ARE on the list however would include ones like Chris Tomlin, David Crowder Band, and for the daring ones, we might even go as far as to say Anberlin is one. Ones that are NOT on the list however are ones like Lifehouse, Natashia Bedingfield, and The Fray.
The Lover-This group usually consist of girls, since they refuse to listen to music that isn't sung by a hot guy between the ages of 16 and 23, or isn't a sappy love song written by a blonde haired college girl. Bands in this group include ones like Taylor Swift, Jonas Brothers, Miley Cyrus, or Enrique Iglesias.
The All Around Listener-Lastly, people in this group weren't daring, or creative enough to stick to one genre, so they figured they would fit in with everyone and simply like every kind of music. People here think they're better than everyone because they're more "open" to every kind of music out there and have such great taste.
Well that's it, I don't know if I made any connections with any of you, but that's what I was aiming for. And if I didn't, well then by all means, send me a threatening email telling me how wrong I was, or maybe how much I might have insulted you.
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